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Polygamy is allowed only to provide psychological, social and economic support for widows with orphans (See 4:127). Muhammed's practice of polygamy must have been in accordance with the condition to serve an important social service. Sure, physical attraction of widows might be one of the factors for marriage and there is nothing wrong with that. Those who could afford practicing polygamy, mentally and financially, should try hard to treat them equally, though 4:129 expresses the practical impossibly of attaining that ideal. Additionally, the consent of the first wife is necessary; otherwise, she can always seek divorce. It is clear that polygamy is not an ideal form of marriage and an unusual practice allowed for difficult times, such as a dramatic reduction in the male population during wartime. The age gap between marrying men and women creates a surplus of women who will never be able to find a monogamous partner. By a strict prohibition on polygamy, millions of young women are deprived from having a legitimate relationship with men. The only hope for millions of young girls is to get married with already divorced men, perhaps with kids, or to have a relationship born out of promiscuous sexual practices. The Western world does not prohibit polygamy since many males have sexual relationships with more than one woman at the same time. The only thing that modern societies do is deprive those women from the protection of law; they are there to be used, disposed of and recycled by men! The hypocrisy in the modern attitude becomes clear when homosexuality is defended on the pretext of "consenting adults," but the same standards are not afforded to the polygamists. The conditional permission for polygamy is for the psychological and financial protection of children and their widow mothers, in cases of war or natural disaster.
Polygamy, according to the Old Testament, started with the seventh generation after Cain and continued as a common practice in the patriarchal age together with having concubines (Genesis 4:19 ; 6:2; 16:1; 22:21; 28:8; 29:23, etc.). However, the Old Testament also disapproves of polygamy (Deuteronomy 17:17 ).
The Old Testament contains numerous exaggerated stories. One is about the number of Solomon's wives. The roundness of the numbers of wives and concubines and their total, the three numbers being perfectly round, indicate an intentional exaggeration. "And he had seven hundred wives, princesses, and three hundred concubines: and his wives turned away his heart” (1 Kings 11:3 ). It is highly plausible that the word "hundred" was inserted in the text by later scribes to damage the reputation of Solomon for some political agenda. The following verses depict Solomon as an evil person and idolater. The Quran neither accuses Solomon of indulging in a hedonistic sexual life nor of associating partners with God. Ironically, modern Christians are now bashing Solomon for not sticking to monogamy. To be politically correct, modern Christians do not hesitate to condemn the common practice of polygamy among Jews and their prophets.
Contrary to the Quran, which exhorts muslims to help widows, the misogynistic Rabbinical teachings inserted into the Old Testament put them in the category of harlots, and finds them unworthy of marriage by the privileged class: priests (Leviticus 21:14 ).
The expression Ma malakat aymanukum has been translated by most translations as "whom your right hands posses" or "captives" or "concubines." (See the note 23:6). We translated this and similar expressions found in 4:3; 16:71; 23:6; 24:31; 30:28; 33:50; and 70:30, as "those with whom you have contractual rights." These were the wives of the enemy combatants who were persecuted because they acknowledged the message of Islam and sought asylum at the Muslim community (60:10). Since they did not get through a normal divorce process, an exceptional contract allows them to marry muslims as free women. Marrying them could create some social, economic and personal complications for the husband. They have nothing to do with IBaD (slaves), as sectarian translations and commentaries state. As we will learn, the Quran categorically rejects slavery and considers it to be the greatest sin (See 3:79; 4:25; 5:89; 8:67; 24:32; 58:3; 90:13; 2:286; 12:39; 79:24). The practice of slavery was justified and resurrected to a certain extent via the influence of Jewish and Christian scholars, as well as fabricated hadith and sharia laws, decades after Muhammed's departure.
It is ironic that Jews who suffered the most from slavery and were saved by God through the leadership of Moses (Exodus 1:13-14 ), later justified enslaving other people, including selling one's own daughter, and inserted that practice into their holy books (Exodus 21:7-8 ; 21:21; 26-27; Leviticus 25:44-46 ; Joshua 9:6-27 ).
Though Jesus never condoned slavery, St. Paul, the founder of modern Christianity, once asked the masters to treat their slaves nicely (Colossians 3:22 ), and asked the slaves to be "submissive to your masters with all fear" (1 Peter 2:18 ; Ephesians 6:5 ; 1 Timothy 6:2 ; Colossians 3:22 ; Titus 2:9 ) justifying the Marxist maxim, "Religion is the opium of masses." The use of religion by the privileged class to enslave or exploit people is vividly depicted by the South African archbishop Desmond Tutu: "When the missionaries came to Africa, they had the Bible and we had the land. They said 'let us close our eyes and pray'. When we opened them, we had the Bible, and they had the land."
The word YaMYN means "right hand" or metaphorically "right," "power" or "control." However, its plural form aYMaN is consistently mentioned in the Quran to mean not "right hands" but to mean "oaths" or "promises," implying the mutual nature of the relationship (See 4:33 5:89; 9:12; 16:91; 2:224; 30:28; 66:2; 5:53; 6:109). This unique Quranic usage is similar to the semantic difference between the singular and plural forms of the word Ayat (signs) (see 2:106).
The expression in question, thus could be translated as "those whom your oaths/contracts have rights over" or "those whom you hold rights through your contracts," or by reading aYMaN (oaths/contracts) as an object rather than a subject, "those who hold/possess your contracts."
The marriage declaration is a mutual partnership between two sexes and is formed by participation of family members. A married woman cannot marry another man without getting divorced from her husband. However, if a woman escapes and joins muslims while her husband stayed behind participating in a war against muslims, she may marry a Muslim man without actually getting divorced from her combatant husband; she will legally be considered a divorcee (60:10). Since this contract is different from the normal marriage contract, this special relationship is described in different words. The same is valid for a man whose wife allies with the hostile enemy. See 24:31 and 33:55. Those who work for another person according to employment contracts are also referred to with the same expression. See 16:71; 30:28. Also, see 4:25; 23:6; 24:58; 33:50; 33:52; 70:30.
The Quran does not demand those who lived together based on a mutual promise (AYMaN) during the days of ignorance, without a marriage contract, to get divorced. Similarly, it does not want those who married two sisters before accepting islam to be a way of life (4:23). This tolerance does not encourage living together without marriage. It only does not want to incur further damage to the family structure and does not want to create hurdles for those who wish to live according to the principles of islam. via Edip-Layth (Quran: A Reformist Translation)
Presentation on theme: "Islam on general relations between men & women:"— Presentation transcript: Published byJody Riley
1 Is it wrong for a Muslim to make “friendship” with the opposite sex (boyfriend and girlfriend)?
2 Islam on general relations between men & women:
Muslims should have good relations with all people, males as well as females, at school, at work, in your neighborhood etc. You should be kind and courteous to everyone. Allah says in Surah Tawbah: Verse 71The believing men and believing women are allies of one another. They enjoin what is right and forbid what is wrong and establish prayer and give zakah and obey Allah and His Messenger. Those - Allah will have mercy upon them. Indeed, Allah is Exalted in Might and Wise.
3 From Verse 71 of Surah Tawbah we understand that there should be a general attitude of goodness and respect when dealing with the opposite gender, but it should not go beyond that to friendship as one has with ones same gender as we will see from the verses of the Quran and hadeeth of the Prophet given ahead:
4 However, it is not allowed in Islam to take a non-mahram person or persons of the opposite gender as a close friend. Such friendship often leads to haram:Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):“Made lawful to you this day are al-tayyibaat [all kinds of halaal (lawful) foods…]. The food of the People of the Scripture (Jews and Christians) is lawful to you and yours is lawful to them. (Lawful to you in marriage) are chaste women from the believers and chaste women from those who were given the Scripture (Jews and Christians) before your time, when you have given their due mahr (bridal money given by the husband to the wife at the time of marriage), desiring chastity (i.e., taking them in legal wedlock), not committing illegal sexual intercourse, nor taking them as girlfriends. And whosoever disbelieves in the Oneness of Allaah and in all the other Articles of Faith, the fruitless is his work, and in the Hereafter he will be among the losers.” [al-Maa’idah 5:5]
5 In the Qur’an, Allah mentioned that good men and women are those who marry, do not have fornicating relationships and do not have "darlings" or “sweethearts” (meaning boyfriends or girlfriends (Akhdan see Quran, Surah An-Nisaa’: 25, and Surah Al-Ma'idah: 5).Akhdan are "sweethearts" or for a man a "girlfriend" and for a woman a "boyfriend".The Prophet, peace and blessings be upom him, is reported to have stated that “whenever two strangers of the opposite gender are alone with each other, Satan becomes the third one between them.” (At-Tirmidhi)”
6 Can guys and girls just be friends
Can guys and girls just be friends? The answer to this question can be found in the Quran subhanAllah. People can argue back and forth about the matter of relations between boys and girls, but the truth is that during our relations with the opposite gender, at some point someone begins to develop feelings. Relations between guys and girls are permitted in Islam, but only to a certain extent of course. An example of that is found in Sura Al-Qasas through the story of Prophet Musa (peace be upon him) and how he dealt with the two women he came across in Midian. The lesson behind this story is that relations between non-mahram men and women is permissible and not completely forbidden as some people believe. Prophet Musa lowered his gaze and helped the two daughters of Shu'ayb purely out of kindness, as Allah commands that we show compassion and mercy towards one another. Prophet Musa, interacted with them in a manner that showed hayaa and self respect.
7 Although the Quran states that contact with the opposite sex is permissible, that does not mean that it is okay to step outside the bounds Allah has set for us. What are the restrictions placed upon us? Lower your gaze (Surah Nur: Verses 30-31)Avoid speaking in ways that could be taken as flirting. It has been said that laughter and joking should be avoided between non-mahram couples. (Surah Ahzab: Verse 32)Avoid being alone with the opposite sex, as shayan is the third. Meet in groups and within those groups, distance should be kept between the brothers and sisters. (From Hadeeth)Follow the dress code Allah prescribed to you and dress modestly. (Surah Nur: 31, Surah Ahzab: 59)
9 Is social media good for Muslim youth?
10 Before we discuss the topic of Social Media being good or bad for Muslims, let’s see what Islam says about the importance of time and the situation of those who waste time:
11 And follow not (O man i. e. , say not, or do not or witness not, etc
And follow not (O man i.e., say not, or do not or witness not, etc.) that of which you have no knowledge. Verily! The hearing, and the sight, and the heart, for all of those you will be questioned (by Allah). (Surah Israa: verse 36)
12 The Prophet, peace be upon him, warned us, "Man shall not be let go or discharged on the Day of Judgement until he has been questioned about FOUR things:1- with regard to his Life: how did he spend it? 2- with regard to his Youth: in what ways did he expend it? 3- with regard to his Wealth: where did he earn it from and what did he spend it on? 4- with regard to his Knowledge: what use did he put it to?“(Al-Bazzar and At-Tabarani)
13 Imam Ash-Shafiee would say, "Time is like a Sword
Imam Ash-Shafiee would say, "Time is like a Sword. Cut it (wisely), before it cuts you!" Therefore, kill your time productively, before it kills you!
14 MAKING FRIENDS ON SOCIAL MEDIA
15 The lines below discuss the importance of friends in the light of Islam and what different criterions should a Muslim follow pertaining to the matter of making friends.In Quran, Allah Almighty says: “And (remember) the day when the unjust one shall bite his hands saying: O! Would that I had taken a way with the Messenger! O woe is me! Would that I had not taken such a one for a friend! Certainly he led me astray from the reminder after it had come to me. Ah! The Evil One is but a traitor to man!.” (25:27-29)Pertaining to the righteous friends, Allah Almighty says in Quran:“Friends on the Day will be enemies one to another, except al-Muttaqun (i.e. those who have piety).” (43:67)From this ayah it is clear that on the Day of Judgment there won’t be any friends, rather it would be such a situation that friends would turn into enemies. At such an instance, only those who are pious would remain friends of each other. Therefore, if one is to make friends, then he or she should make friends who are pious, because such friends don’t just remain friends in this world only, rather they remain friends in the world hereafter as well and help each other out.The Prophet Muhammad (Sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) said:“A good friend and a bad friend are like a perfume-seller and a blacksmith: The perfume-seller might give you some perfume as a gift, or you might buy some from him, or at least you might smell its fragrance. As for the blacksmith, he might burn your clothes, and at the very least you will breathe in the fumes of the furnace.”(Sahih Al-Bukhari)
16 General discussion of the usage and effects of Social Media on a person
17 Today we find ourselves with technology advancing in leaps and bounds and if we do not use that technology positively then it will be used in a destructive manner in order to promote that which is incorrect. That which is invalid and that which will earn the wrath of Allah and perhaps snatch away the peace from our lives.The scholars have come to the agreement that it is permissible and in fact it is necessary for us to make use of whatever the latest technology is, in order to beam the message of peace across the globe.Islam governs how to use it. It’s like a knife. You can use the knife to chop up your meat so that you can cook it properly or you can actually use it in a wrong way. A knife can be used as a weapon. It depends how the person uses it. Islam says, use it in the correct way. Make sure that you use it in the proper way so that the day I meet with my Maker who is the source of all peace I will be from amongst those who has not left a single stone unturned in trying to reach out to the people in a beautiful way. So how did I make use of the social networks that were at my disposal?If you take a careful look at technology, on many different forms you have the social media. For example, there are magazines, the internet forums, the web blogs, the social blogs, microblogging, the wikis, the social networks, podcasts, photos, videos, the ratings, social books and so many other things that we actually have not only the ability to source but even to be a part of its making or creation. So make sure that you have used it in the correct way, and this is how Allah will bless us in this world and the next.
18 If you take a look at the word ‘social’, Islam has indeed given a very great importance to social interaction but within limits and for the right reasons. If you look at the salah we read, the congregational prayer, the hadith says that Salah in congregation is better than Salah read individually 27 times. The reason is – interaction. The physical meeting is far more important than anything else.Allah has made it so easy for us to earn a huge reward just by the touch of a button. Let’s ask ourselves, “Are we doing that? Or are we earning the wrath of the Almighty by the touch of the same button?” Because in the same way that I can press just some knob on my phone and I can reach out to hundreds or millions of people with the correct message, I can do the same with the bad message. So ask yourself how you are using it. Allah has made it easy for you to earn reward as much as possible before you meet with Allah.It’s extremely important to know that this social interaction in Islam is definitely an act of worship if it is done correctly, and this is when it comes to the physical relation, you know, to spend time with your parents, children, grandparents and relatives, it’s extremely important. But we are quick to use all of these methods of interaction when it comes to wrong because the devil makes the wrong look good.
19 Remember, pornography, and interaction in the wrong way with the opposite gender is something that would destroy your peace. It is something that might soothe your lusts that is inside but as a result the cactus that grows around your heart is so huge because it snatches away peace. So therefore, stay away from it. And worse than actually engaging in looking at something derogatory is to forward it to others just as a joke. And this is where Islam comes in.The Prophet (peace be upon him) says, whoever sets a bad example, whoever has started a bad trend, they will bear the burden of it and the burden of everyone else as a result who has been affected by it, or who drops into it up to the Last Day. And that would not decrease the burden from anyone of them who followed the bad. And whoever sets a good example, whoever has started a good trend, they will get the reward of it and the reward of everyone else as a result who has been affected by it, or who drops into it up to the Last Day. And that would not decrease the reward from anyone of them who followed the good.This is something very dangerous. So remember, do not look at and/or forward something that is pornographic, bad, racist, something of the nature where we are earning the anger of Allah or it is something sinful because the click of the button could mean great destruction to us. We ask Allah to save us. It is something extremely important. Also what Islam has done is it has given us rules and regulations regarding so many things.
20 People are on social networks for different reasons
People are on social networks for different reasons. Some are there to spread goodness. Others are there to just have fun. And some are there to con you and to dupe you and others are there just to abuse you. So be careful.Allah says, When you call towards the path of the Almighty, choose the most wise of all methods. Surat Nahl, Qu’ran 16:125And when you engage people in discussion, make sure it is the most powerful or the best of ways. So this would apply even when we are interacting with one another when it comes to social networking and so on. The difficulty we have after we’ve created a profile, we have friends. So we choose friends, we follow friends and people befriend us. The type of friends you choose is extremely important. It will shape your peace or it will break it. This is why those who have chosen bad friends, then we need to get ourselves out of that as soon as possible because Allah speaks about it in the Quran in Surah Furqan where Allah speaks of the one who will regret because of his bad company and he will say, Oh! I hope I had taken the path that the Messenger had taught and I hope I did not have so and so as a friend of mine because he has led me astray after the goodness was made manifest to me. Surat Al-Furqan 25:27-29So make sure your online friends are those who are people reminding you of goodness and turning you away from that which is bad for you. If they encourage you to do something bad, you need to take a step back. And you need to ask yourself where this friendship is leading you to – Hell or Heaven. May Allah help us to make the best use of Social Media for ourselves and for others.
Date Your Wife, Flirt With Your Husband
In Islam couples who are married have immense rights over each other. They are meant to live and “and harmony” as prescribed by Allah not just for the first few days or the first several months of their marriage but for their entire lives together. Most married couples lose interest in each other as the years pass by and as their family extends with them getting more and more busy and responsibilities piling up. However, Allah and His Prophet (PBUH) has asked us to keep the love and spark in our marriages alive forever.
This means that couples should, even after years of marriage behave with each other with love and respect. Nowadays the concept of non-halal dating has arisen where couples who are not married according to the commandments of Islam “date” each other. They go out with each other, hold hands and indulge in all sorts of haraam. But the beauty of Muslim marriage is such that all this can be done whilst being married.
Allah has not stopped us from dating. By all means Muslim couples are allowed to “date” but do so after marriage. Do not think that dating is something that can be done before marriage. Indeed, any sort of contact between and man and a woman without a mehram present is not allowed. Dating CAN and should be done after marriage. And not just in the first few days rather for the entire duration of the married life. So Muslim husbands, never stop dating your wives! Love them, cuddle them, hold their hands, tell them you love them and make them laugh. Indeed all the above are sunnahs of the Prophet Mohammad (PBUH)
In the same way married Muslim women are completely allowed to flirt with their husbands. It is halal and very much encouraged within the boundaries of normal societal norms. Married Muslim women should dress up for their husbands, wear a nice perfume for them, talk to them calmly and sweetly and maybe even flirt a little. They should be quick to forgive, willing to share their days excitements, be a source of encouragement and all the while trusting and prying to Allah to make their marriage work forever.
Many marriages would be more successful if the husband and the wife knew they were on the same side. When they are on the same side that means that the only thing against them is the ‘shaitaan’ who would like nothing more than to make their marriage fail. Defeat the shaitaan and continue to date your wives and flirt with your husbands. via http://singlemuslimmatrimony.com/
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